[Report This]Date: 21 Apr 2016 06:47 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 9.5 - In Her Name
Nice little epilogue to this great series of stories. After what Reihyn was able to accomplish with a badly outdated starship, it didn't come as much of a surprise that he would get another shot at the center seat. I like that he gets a ship with teeth this time around and even better that he stands up big for his old crew.
All this of course cries out for another adventure of the Orion II, to see what this captain and his once less than stellar crew can do on a modern starship.
Date: 19 Apr 2016 21:46 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 9.5 - In Her Name
Yes the intrepid class is better known, which does not mean we cant allow our imagination to take us into new directions. While I like the intrepid class, I am glad you didnt go with it.
This reminded me to say something about the Star Trek cliche's.
Perhaps the best example is " replicated food is terrible " sounds fammiliar ? Well I guess, enitonally you would always think your Mom's home cooking is better then what the replicator can deliver. But I see no reason for the replicated food to be terrible. Infact, by all logic replicated food should be just as good as real, if not better. Replicators work in a very simular principal as transporters, so if a transported person comes out on the other end perfectly the same as he was before transport, then i dont see why the replicator cant deliver a perfect steak, as it was when a real steak was scanned and put into the replicators memory.
Another clich'e that annoys me a lot is the insistance of so many authors fo the crew accomodations have to be cramped, uncomfortable, and generally very spartan. Why should the accomodation be spartan ? Of course, the senior officers have larger and more opulent quarters, but everyone else, even the lowliest crewman shoul have their own private quarters . Giving everyone on the ship a private place where they know they can always go to and be away from everyone is very important for the psychological well being of the crew. The quarters dont have to be luxurios, but they have to be nice and comfortable, perhaps a standard quarters should consist of a small living room, a bedroom, small private bathroom, and also contain a replicator for personnal use.
This is not a criticism, I am merely giving comments generally on the ST fiction. Infact i think on the first Orion you had each of the crewman have their own small room, that made me happy.
I encourige you to let your imagination roam freely, dont be bound by what was said or was not said in the movies or in the episodes.
[Report This]Date: 19 Apr 2016 21:43 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 9 - Gone But Not Forgotten
It was, I suppose, only ever a question of time until this little ship that could would meet her ultimate fate. After all the deck had been stacked against her from the very beginning: Outdated, underpowered and crewed by a group of misfits and outcasts. And yet the ship and her crew performed better than anyone could have ever expected, and as you so poignantly demonstrate here, it was only ever because of a captain who managed to bring out the best out of his crew.
I am sorry that DuMont didn't make it off the ship, but glad that she went out like a hero, maybe for the first time in her life, rising to the occasion and showing everyone that she in fact did have what it takes. Too bad she had to give her own life to prove it.
What a terrific 'mini-series' you've given us here by showcasing the unsung heroes of Starfleet and their ultimate sacrifice. Also, wouldn't mind seeing where these characters will go after this, I would imagine some of these have great careers ahead of them.
[Report This]Date: 18 Apr 2016 22:10 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 9.5 - In Her Name
A Norway class ! good choice. Now D'Kehra is going to get the chanse to kick some Dominion ass, as for the sweet little Enan, I guess a position as a chief engeneer on a new advanced ship, will be like birthday and Christmass rolled into one. Well they dont have a Christmass in the Rigel system... but hey, I dont think she is the type to turn away a gift.
Hmmm who is going to be the new flight control officer, why not a sexy Betazoid or an ( unjoined ) Trill girl this time ? Good work, I am standing by for the continuation.
By the way, have you read the Dark Horizon stories by Michael Gray ? He knows how to write stories with lots of grandure, involving time travel, ancient mysteries, as well as intrigue and back stabbings involved in the work of the inteligence community. However the accent of the stories is on the inner doubts and the interpersonnal relationships of averige Starfleet officers, who try to put their lives together and to do best they can, but sometimes its just to much for them. In case you havent read it already, check it out you might like it.
http://darkhorizon.4mg.com/
Author's Response:
Thank you, I've always really liked the Norway-Class. For a time I did consider an Intrepid, since they're better known, but I like the former better so went with that instead.
D'Kehra will get to do what she does best, as well as having a few more newbies to take under her wing. As for Lanali, she'll have the Orion-II fine tuned to within an inch of its life :)
I have three new officers to introduce, who will be getting a little moment together in the next piece that I'm trying to write--if only RL would stop getting in the way!
I've read some of Michael's work, not much unfortunately. He is also an administrator of another board I am on, which focuses on Trek photomanips (and other artwork), and has some dame good work there too.
[Report This]Date: 18 Apr 2016 10:05 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 8 - Hidden In Plain Sight
Well, this installment really had it all, didn't it? Mystery, action and romance. I actually enjoyed the Lenali and Jachim scenes the most, for their innocent vibe. These two characters were clearly meant for each other, and I like how Jachim has developed from a bit of a jackass to an actually like able guy. Of course it needs a dramatic and ultimately tragic event for him to act on his feelings.
My only minor nitpick with this story is the seemingly unrelated ending. Maybe it is setting up events in the next story but it felt a bit out of place.
Great Orion outing regardless.
[Report This]Date: 15 Apr 2016 19:33 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 7 - The Living Death
Certainly an emotionally intense story here, with an ending that took me a bit by surprise.
I liked the initial focus on the underachieving and self doubting DuMont here, in fact would have loved to see even more of her, i.e, her developing into a more confident command officer. Maybe we'll get to see more of that in later stories, or perhaps she will never fully emerge as a high class officer, and that's fine, too, not everybody is.
Kudos for sticking with the depressing ending as well. I was of course rooting for some sort of last minute solution as is customary in his kind of stories. But as they say, sometimes you get the bear, and sometimes the bear gets you.
I felt however that Baxx and the others gave up way too soon on his terminal condition. In fairness I read this story over a few days and may have missed something, but I felt they didn't try enough to save his life and exhaust every possibility before accepting the inevitable. I believe the story could have been more powerful if we had seen them try and fail at finding a way to cure him.
I also thought the ending, blowing him up with torpedoes while he was still alive, while dramatically powerful, was needlessly cruel. Surely nobody wants to die in a fiery inferno like that.
Regardless of the above, still a very engaging story in what has been a terrific series so far.
[Report This]Date: 13 Apr 2016 20:43 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 9 - Gone But Not Forgotten
Damn, just as I really got involved in the series, it had to end, why so soon ? I even thought of suggesting a longer episode with a more complex plot, I do have a few stray thoughts on how it would look like, but connecting ideas into a finished plot is a difficult endevour.
Can I ask how you decide on a specific story plots ? do you take the insiration out of something you have seen in an episode or the story just pops into your mind, or some combination of different factors ? As I said in my earlier review, all of them are good, though my favorite is the 8'th one, with the mission to the outpost.
They insisted the outpost is creepy, but I kind of liked it. Ok, you didnt give to detailed a description, yet the things you did describe made sense, it was crude beacouse it wasnt meant for long term habitation, and yet it had everything needed for a few days stay of a small crew. I like writings where it appears the author has given some thought to the locations where the story takes place.
Infact i spent some time thinking of how starfleet remote outposts are designed, and what types and classes can be there and what the perpose of each can be.
My second favorite is the one where they transported the Marines. However, it's end irritated me a bit. I wished there was a short exchange of fire between the Orion and one of the enemy ships, this was going to be more dramatic then the single hit they sustained on their shields.
Also, after they unloaded the Marines, they simply parked themselves one light hour outside the system, and decided to watch and wait. Instead they could have come up with a plan, to load one or two of the shattles with antimatter or other high explosives, then program them to fly at high speed to the nearest Cardassian warship, and slam into it destroying or dammiging it in the process. Basicly a trick out of the Dominions own book. I know a plan like this could be risky, since friendly ships can be damaged in the explosion, but I think it could have been fitting to the impulsive character of D'Kehra. ( I am not complaining, just giving suggestions )
This last one was also good, though nothing was said ( unless I missed it ), on how and why the Orion ended in a battle against a Breen warship. The battle sequence was good though ! It was exciting yes, but also realistic. Again I have a feeling you have given it some thought of how much a ship like the Orion can last against a warship, so you didnt overdo its capabilities, but also you still gave it some chanse, well done ! Ah yes, thanks God, D Kehra, and Enan survived to fight another day and to star in some new future series.
Speaking of a new series, perhaps one taking place few months later, after the war has ended, but the quadrant is in shumbles. So Captain Ryhin and some of the former crew of the Orion are given a new ship, say, a Saber, or a Steamrunner class, and tasked with patrolling and dealing with problems as they crop up.
Wishful thinking on my part of course, in any case, thanks for the effort you put into writing this stories, reading them was fun.
Author's Response:
Sorry that it had to end, but I always thought this would be a mini mini-series (don’t worry there is one more little snippet and one last short story to come). I’ve got a few other longer stories, though they do deal with other crews, that I really need to edit and get posted here—including my novel-length first ever piece of completed Trek fanfic (the first chapter of “Underworld” has already been posted). Suggestions and ideas are always welcome—I’ve thought of another idea that would’ve fit in really well, though I might have to save that either for another ship or write at another time, though I don’t really like adding new stories out of chronological order (but that’s just me).
Sometimes there are elements from episodes that spark an idea that I’d like to see more of, other times it’s more ‘what story would I like this character to have, and how would that fit into the larger world’. Sometimes they’re just stray thoughts that cross my mind that I think would be cool to work on. All of these stories started off as just a single sentence, so I had no idea where they would go (for the most part, for example I always knew the likes of Baxx would die before the end and DuMont would give her life for the ship).
The base was really just ‘non-descript’ in appearance, boxy and utilitarian. Though given the covert nature of it I didn’t think it needed much by way of description. The main thing that was important was its isolation and claustrophobic nature, I wanted to give it a very “haunted house” feel.
The ending of “The Only Easy Day...” pretty much, for me, sums up everything I had in mind for the Orion when I thought it up. She is suited for combat (as this story proves), instead she has to rely on others for protection (risking their lives) so that she can finish the job she has been given. She could’ve tried to trade blows, but there’s no guarantee that a transfer conduit would blow leaving her crippled, just because she wanted to fire off an underpowered phaser bank. I always found Voyager and Enterprise had far too much focus on battles every week (granted DS9 had its fair share of battles, but that was war and not every episode seemed to be resolved with one) and I’ve written quite a few myself, so I wanted to go down a very different path, looking at how it would feel for those people standing on the sidelines, eager to do something but can’t because of circumstance.
How the Orion ended up in battle is covered in the vignette that I’ll be posting soon, whilst there is still a final story in the series to be written (my original idea for it wasn’t going anywhere so I’ve had to rethink it). D’Kehra almost died alongside Ensign Mecell, but I changed my mind at the last minute.
Watch this space. There will be one very short piece to come and then a longer one that will, hopefully, see them through to the end of the war and beyond.
Thank you very much for reading them and taking the time to comment.
[Report This]Date: 12 Apr 2016 19:53 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 6 - No Man's Land
So we get to focus on Ramirez in this outing and get a couple of surprises while we're at it, too. And then in best Star Wars tradition, an all-or-nothing, edge of your seat, dogfight with the Cardassians.
Liked the ending here as well, keeping up the suspense of if Ramirez survived worked well, keeping me wondering until the very end.
[Report This]Date: 10 Apr 2016 10:24 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 5 - Wolf In Sheep's Clothing
Talk about facing your demons, head on. It was to be expected that transporting Cardassian prisoners would not go without incident for this crew, and with their brutal history, there were bound to be some personal connections.
Great character segment for Mecell certainly, who presumably now gets a chance to finally move on from the darkest chapter of his life.
[Report This]Date: 09 Apr 2016 14:46 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 4 - The Only Easy Day...
Oh Marines and Fleeters, why can't you ever just get along? Hell of a way to start a story though, with a good ol'fashioned, if rather one-sided bar brawl. D’Kehra clearly is a serious bad-ass. Or maybe it was the fact that the three jarheads were drunk.
And while we are getting a little glimpse here at her background, the most important question about her history reminds unanswered. At least she is getting a bit of love ... and then some. I wonder if this might complicate things for the good captain though. Conventional wisdom says, hands off your own crew. Even Kirk knew this. Well, most of the time at least.
Still appreciate your restraint here and your continued focus on Orion's less glorious but no less vital mission, instead of on the battle raging around her. Nice.
Author's Response:
Good thing I didn't include Border Dogs or there would be nothing left of the ship, hehe! When I think of D'Kehra in action, I imagine River Tam, tiny but whoops serious ass--definitely not the kind of person to be underestimated...ever.
The Deimos incident is a mystery even to me, and due to its heavily classified nature then the events of it would never pass the Lieutenant's lips--she may have suffered at the hands of Starfleet regs but still believes in them. As for the...ahem...relationship, well now I'm almost finished with this series, part of me wishes I'd done a little more on that (of course there could always be an Orion Next Generation).
Thanks, that was the primary goal of this series, to look at the war outside of the combat.
[Report This]Date: 07 Apr 2016 07:45 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 3 - Amid The Ruins
Didn't think things could get much grimmer for this crew, but this latest recovery mission was downright brutal as well as emotionally exhaustive. You did a great job of presenting it as such.
I liked the focus on Jachim here as well. He was the one crewmember most in need of a serious attitude adjustment, in my opinion, and thanks to coming face to face with the place of his greatest failure, or at least greatest tragedy, he seems well under way of starting to appreciate what he has again, instead of pining for what he doesn't.
So I guess, finding a good friend of his alive after all this time helped as well, even if it seemed a little bit convenient from a story-telling perspective (not sure if you explained how he managed to survive without food or water for ten weeks). I liked it nevertheless, especially because you managed to turn a rather unlikeable character into a human being again.
Date: 05 Apr 2016 15:55 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 2 - Broken And Bloodied
The crew gets their first taste of action and things in fact come pretty close to actual blows here. I like the fact that tension isn't if they are going to survive a battle with the enemy, but if they even get into a battle in the first place.
And I liked the tension here quite a bit, the way these subpar Starfleet officers handle themselves if put on the spot. Some very nearly cracked, others lived up to their potential.
This isn't a tale about battles (at least not yet), but about what happens after, and that is a fascinating perspective.
Looking forward for Myza to join this crew, no doubt she'll have her hands full.
Author's Response: Thank you CeJay. After having written quite a few battles myself, I wanted to try an move away from that and look at things from people on the sidelines. I do have a couple of tactical engagements for the Orion ahead, one of which I'm working on now, but this is most certainly a ship from a bygone era not suited for modern warfare. I hope you enjoy the rest of them.
[Report This]Date: 01 Apr 2016 22:19 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 5 - Wolf In Sheep's Clothing
I wished if you left out the gay thing, gay scenes seem to be a requiremant this days ( sighs ). I dont have a problem with gay romance for as long it is among females :).
Other then this I liked the story, all your stories, I like the easy to read style, and how the characters are " down to earth " rather then those super human geneouses that ussualy populate the starfleet ships :).
Speaking of Humans, another thing I really appriciate, is that you make sure to include many of the other races rather then have the entire crew consisting mostly of humans, sprinkled here and there with a Vulcan or Andorian for decorum sake. I know, they had to do it that way in the TV shows due to technical or financial reasons, but I dont see why so many of the fiction authors have to go along with it. Once again, I am glad you are different. Naturally my favorite character is D'Kahra. Not just beacouse she is an Orion, which is appealing to me, but also beacouse she is not apploduzung much for being an Orion, while in the same time she is a capible and dedicated officer.
Enan is another of my favorite characters, she is a cute little thing who makes you want to take her home and have her fix all your broken applainces, which she will do while smiling all the time. Hmmm I guess I do have a thing for Vulcan and Vulcanoid women
Keep up the good work, I look forward to reading the next episodes.
Author's Response:
Thank you for taking the time to write a review, they're always appreciated :)
Sorry the 'gay scenes' from "No Man's Land" aren't your thing, my original idea for it was quite different, but as I was writing I ended up in a completely new place, as is always the case. I know others won't like the appeal of them as much as I do (between two hairy manly men, mmm...anyway) but it help adds to the diversity of the crew, which is something I always strive for, hence all the aliens. I don't think I've written a story that had more than a 50% human crew complement, usually they only make up a third. D'Kehra is a kick in the head, who won't apologise for who/what she is, and Enan is the kind of person who'd fix everything in your house, build a dozen new appliances you never knew you needed, and after finishing would ask 'can I help with anything else'.
Working on Part 8 now, hopefully have it ready in the next couple of days, then comes the finale!
Date: 17 Mar 2016 17:12 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 2 - Broken And Bloodied
Ok so the Orion made it out of spacedock and is put on search and rescue duty. Immediately the crew is brought into the action. Captain Burbank trying to be a gentlemen but almost forgetting to follow protocol, gave me a chuckle. I liked Baxx’s line too I laughed along with Reihyn. It was nice to see Ramirez no longer the trouble maker, but able bodied crewman. Seeing the images of the destroyed ships on the viewscreen defiantly not good for the crew, but they knew that had jobs to do.
Again I like how you interwove this within canon with the Trial, I remember that ship being mentioned in an episode. Of course Baxx would hate the EVA suit. Jachim, while not wanting to be on the Orion, does seem to perform his duties here. The Orion withstood it’s first trial by fire when the Cardassians showed up, I like how that was portrayed, I did enjoy the captain’s log entry as well.
You showed that Koen was vulnerable, I like how you handled that. He came to terms with his inabilities, and hopefully he grows from that. It sounds like the Orion does have it’s fair share of problems with the warp drive. It’ll be interesting to see what kind of an impact Myza will have now that she’s been appointed counselor.
Again, another enjoyable story Bry. Hope to see more with the Orion.
Author's Response: Baxx is at an age where he speaks his mind to everyone, no matter what rank or position they hold, so I foresee a lot of fun to be had with him. The Trial was one of the ships that arrived at DS9 in "Way of the Warrior" just after the Klingons attacked the station. Jachim may hate his assignment, but he is a professional and an officer looking to advance himself, so he's not going to screw that up just because he's stuck onboard. Reihyn is skilled, has potential, but is still young and lacks some of the polish of more experienced Captain's, so his logs are always being to be a little more honest. Mecell is someone who has a lot of scars from his past and no real clue on how to deal with them. The Orion is a flying repair job, every system is being held together with a lot of hope. As for Myza, it was as I was finishing up the first piece that I realised a Counsellor would actually make a lot of sense onboard, I just hadn't planned on one at the time, so I had to get one slipped onboard--especially one who is a little more multi-talented than we saw Troi.
Date: 17 Mar 2016 16:50 Title: Star Trek: Orion - 1 - Connecting The Dots
I really enjoyed reading this Bry, and thought it was a great concept. I particularly liked reading about Reihyn’s rise through the ranks as you mixed it with canon by mentioning the battle with the Klingons, and then mixing in the Jem’Hadar. I really liked the line where you said being offered the Orion was an offer he couldn’t refuse.
You definitely captured the spirit of an older ship being put back into service with your description of what it was like when first stepping on board. Good job there. The Orion is definitely going to have to operate differently than most Starfleet vessels given it’s age, and lack of resources especially with the crew.
Very good description of the Constellation-class bridge from what I remember of it. Koen like Nog rushed through the Academy to serve in the war, even though he’s not the sharpest tool in the drawer. I’m not sure what to think of DuMont yet given her past, but I’m sure we’ll see more of her in due time. I like the idea of Baxx returning to the Orion since he started out on it, and I like his stance on the EMH. An Orion security chief serving on a starship named Orion, I must say I do like the irony in that. Sounds like Ramirez has caused some trouble, hopefully he’ll shape up. I did get a bit of a chuckle when Jachim asked to be reassigned, it reminded me of a movie I once saw with a very similar premise, and I like how the captain dealt with him.
Overall, a very enjoyable first outing. This crew doesn’t have the best ship, and they may not be the best themselves, but hopefully they have something to offer.
Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed it MIck :) I do try and stick to canon as much as I can, mixing it in with my own personal thoughts on events in the wider galaxy. Given all Starfleet has been through even before the beginning of the Dominion War, it kinda made sense to me that a promising young officer might get a boost faster than normal. Reihyn would've most likely made Captain by the time he was 35, events just sped that progression up a little more, and with his eyes set on the "big chair" then he was never likely to be one to say 'no' to another command--no matter what ship it was. Yeah, the old girl is not going to be a glamerous assignment, won't likely see battle or make a glorious name for herself, she'll be a workhorse, very much behind the scenes doing all the hard work needed to keep the fleet fighting. As for the bridge, I was inspired by the layout of the Enterprise-A from TFF. I'm glad you like my cast of characters. I've always been interested in the sort of people who were only ever 'average', who fell through the cracks and were just there to make up the numbers. Most will never achieve greatness, but they're all competent enough (even if a little troubled).