Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 14 Apr 2010 23:03 Title: Chapter 4: Engagement Interrupted

Oh boys, a fine job done by all - except you! Rodgers was arrogant and cocky and unwilling to listen. Dangerously so, leaving one to wonder how this pan out. Again, it is impressive how M'ree is being influenced and still disconcerting to see the continued influence. Though it is proving to be remarkably beneficial in ways for M'ree. Gripping stuff. The action was good but Rodgers coming in the way she did had me on tenderhooks as to whether it would all go wrong.

Author's Response:

It's safe to say that she got really lucky this time.  Obviously, she got brought up short.  Perhaps in the next chapter, there will be some consequences for M'ree's interjection on the bridge.  I'm still kind of postulating on the next scene for this one.

Thanks for reading!

-- MDg

Reviewer: Gibraltar Signed [Report This]
Date: 11 Apr 2010 08:38 Title: Chapter 2: Regime Change

Gress is a likeable fellow, and I wonder how he came to be in Starfleet, seeing as his people generally have a pretty contentious relationship with the Federation.  I know you don’t consider Enterprise canon, so I’m guessing Gress is one of the TOS-looking Gorn, rather than the more dinosaur-esque looking ones from In A Mirror Darkly.

M’ree continues to impress, as she successfully holds her own ego in check and fulfills her duty as a loyal XO to her new captain, regardless of the fact that she was not Rodgers’ first choice for the position.  How much of this is M’ree, and how much is the influence of her former captain is moot at this point, as it appears she’s integrated the more positive attributes of that katra into her own personality.

Author's Response:

I didn't mind the dinosaur-looking guys from In a Mirror Darkly, to be honest.  I never said he had a segmented eye, I just said it was yellow and black.  I kind of wanted a Gorn character because I like to showcase a real off-the-wall race, giving us a bit of insight into what they might be perceiving through their own culture and upbringing.

There's a definite split between M'ree's character and T'Miri's influence.  At this point in the story, I think there's a struggle between the two personalities to find a balance.  When T'Miri speaks, M'ree is disoriented by the foreign nature of her thoughts.  Maybe she thinks she's losing it?  Time will tell.

Thanks for reading!

-- MDg

Reviewer: CeJay Signed [Report This]
Date: 06 Apr 2010 20:07 Title: Chapter 3: Getting Underway

Boy, poor M'ree gets seriously screwed over in this fascinating tale, doesn't she? She's got the experience and the rank to command Gallant and Command decides to pass her over for another officer, holding the same rank. Ouch.

No wonder she comes across rather aloof after the new CO comes aboard. And Rodgers doesn't seem to have the aptitude for command judging by the way she treats her subordinates. Finger snapping at you officers would be bad enough if you are an experienced four-pipped captain, but is pretty much unforgivable for a first-time commanding officer who has done nothing to distinguish herself yet.

Bit surprised to see the Border Service taking out top of the line Defiants but I like that we're seeing low ranking officers in charge for once and you've done a great job of capturing the feel of the less stellar life of a Border Dog.

As to be expected you infuse your stories with a sense of military precision on procedure we don't always get to see in Trek stories.

Very eager to see these story-lines continue and taken to their conclusion. Great job.

Author's Response:

Since Defiant-class ships were introduced in the late 2360s, by the late 2390s/early 2400s (the time of this story), they're 30+ years old.  Hardly top-of-the-line when you consider that they've most likely introduced a successor class (or are about to).  Further, due to the output of the war, they should've produced a /lot/ of Defiant-class ships, since they're small and therefore much easier to produce.

I liken them to the PT boats of World War II; we had so many of those things running around the Pacific...  all commanded by LTJGs, too.  I figure, during peacetime, the minimum rank required for command would rise a grade or two, hence a full lieutenant in command of a corvette.  As a sidenote, did you know that the literal translation for a lieutenant commander in the Spanish navy is 'Corvette Captain' (Capitán de Corbeta).  Same for the French, Italian, and Russian navies.

Rodgers is a first-time CO, so she's learning as she goes.  As I replied to Miranda Fave in another review, it's likely she's projecting confidence where she feels none.  In doing so, she's emulating a captain she trained under by perpetuating that behavior.  And likely, it's having the same effect of her crew as it did to that other captain's crew.  Sometimes, we do things like that without thinking, only because it's what we know.  I think it takes a truly exceptional leader to consider before acting, instead of always trying to be assertive and guarding power as closely as Rodgers does in this chapter.

Thanks for reading!

-- MDg

 

 

Reviewer: Mistral Signed [Report This]
Date: 29 Mar 2010 19:31 Title: Chapter 3: Getting Underway

And the katra rears its ugly head...I liked that part a lot, well played.

Author's Response:

The katra will continue to rear in later chapters.

Thanks for reading!

-- MDg

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 29 Mar 2010 13:55 Title: Chapter 3: Getting Underway

Excellent realisation of ship departure, with the various systems and checks. I love the depiction of Rodgers. She seems a capable officer but the rush of pwer to her head has turned it seems and she is making decisions and choices that aren't entirely for the benefit of the crew and ship. Again, the need for spic and span and protocols is not always merited. I like how the Admiral saw through it all, especially any implication that Rodgers had a part to play in the improvement of ship systems. T'Miri's influence is indeed eerie - especially given the slip in fornt of the Admiral. It certainly makes things a little uncomfortable for the Admiral and M'ree. Oh loving this still. One little thing, is there a word missing from the line:"Allie, do not carry the burden of T'Miri's death any longer.  She would not it." Excellent continuation of the story. Can't wait for more.

Author's Response:

There was indeed a word missing from that line.  It has since been corrected.

You misspelled realization, though. ;)  Just kidding.

Thanks for reading!

-- MDg

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 28 Mar 2010 15:16 Title: Chapter 2: Regime Change

Woah. It is knife cutting tension at times between M'ree and Rodgers. Understandably, in her odd behaviour M'ree comes across as a mix of aloof and maybe even arrogant. However, why is Rodgers so prickly when M'ree displays some of the more Vulcan traists she seems to have picked up? It is a difficult situation for both considering that M'ree was effectively in command, Rodgers has to assert her own authority and do so seemingly putting everyone's nose out of joint. For the crew it is even more disconcerting making changes - particularly ones they do not believe very necessary and even redundant. Kudos to M'ree for supporting Rodgers.

Further brilliant crew assembling and portraits with our Klingon NCO and budding friendships between our Gorn and Engineer. Very well realised and all relayed so effectively with an economy of words.

Now all that remains to be seen is whether Rodgers has the right approach for serving on a border patrol vessel. Turning out a spic and span crew is not normally the priority of a border dog captain.

Author's Response:

Some COs are like that in the service.  Not everyone arrives with a practiced understanding of how to command.  They can spend all the time in the sims simulating a crew, but there's no substitute for the real burden of being in command.  Not to mention, sometimes we emulate a command style without realizing it.  Perhaps she's emulating a captain she had who was strict.  Or perhaps she's projecting confidence where none exists?

Thanks for reading!

-- MDg

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 27 Mar 2010 12:49 Title: Chapter 1: Shattered Dreams

Wow. I just love the way you write about life onboard and the terms of career rotations and promotions. It is an aspect I don't tend to consider in my own writing for lack of knowledge on it. But it adds so much authority to your story and add layers of details to lend it an authenticity that is compelling to read.

In addition, your intercrew dynamics is also terrifically realsised. Even the flucuating personality of M'ree between her previous wamer personality and the Vulcan influenced traits she seems to have garnered following the katra. It is a lot for M'ree to process - not that it seems she is fully consigant of it. But add to that her efforts at refittign the ship only to be rewarded with being pushed to XO position instead of attaining the captaincy. It might make for an awkward relationship between her and Rodgers. Apart from M'ree's own ambitions there has to be a part of her that is T'Miri who will be reluctant to relinquish command of 'her' vessel.

The unflolding relationships will be very interesting to see develop. Looking forwards to more.

Author's Response:

I try to do a lot of research before I write.  Of course, in this case, a majority of my research is already done (due to other projects), so it's easy to slip in the details of this lesser-seen aspect of Starfleet, based in part on the US Navy and the US Coast Guard.  I see the Border Patrol as having second-class status within the eyes of the Exploration Command (to which ships like Enterprise would belong to).  A different aspect of service and understanding how the rivalry works between them is one of the reasons I decided to write this story.

Thanks for reading!

-- MDg

Reviewer: Gibraltar Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Mar 2010 08:25 Title: Prologue

Wow, for such a short prologue it certainly packs a sizeable emotional punch.  The effects of the Vulcan captain's katra on her subordinate is telling, though it's impossible to say how much of her former CO will remain a part of M'ree (and I'm only assuming this is what happened here).

Great stuff!  You've captured my attention from word one.

 

Author's Response:

Hopefully, the rest of the story will keep you interested as the prologue did. :)

Thanks for reading!

-- MDg

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 25 Mar 2010 21:01 Title: Prologue

Well that was a thoroughly absorbing moment on the bridge. As it should be with a fallen CO and the horrifying moment when M'ree has to take command. The little details you add help to frame her character as a Caitain, looking down at her paw, her fur matted with blood, simple little things but very effective at creating the sense of a Caitian character. Likewise, the thoughts and feelings that she feels strongly coming from I assume to be the katra of T'Miri, are so evidently those of a proud, strong , logical and disciplined Vulacn mind. I wonder how long might T'Miri continue to exert an influence on M'ree. Certainly, the situation is fascinating and it makes for a fascinating character study - of both M'ree and T'Miri. Very well done.

Author's Response:

Wow, well... like I said before, I'm a little taken aback at the response I've received so far on this story.  Thank you for the kind words of praise.

And thanks for reading!

-- MDg