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Reviewer: Cowgirlcadet1701 Signed [Report This]
Date: 28 May 2013 07:40 Title: STAR TREK: Zero Hour

Good story. I'm eager to read the rest.

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 11 Sep 2011 09:50 Title: STAR TREK: The Dominion Terror Act

Again, reading this with the Romulan flavour to it I am reminded of my own Romulan stories/characters in development and itch to get back into them after being immersed into things here. Details like the fourth name, etc all add a nice Romulan touch to the proceedings. Now Sahs'kei has honour, a name, and death to avenge.

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 11 Sep 2011 09:44 Title: STAR TREK: The Dominion Terror Act

Wow. This got very sci-fi with the tractoring of a planet into a new system. It seems highly impossible but it is sci-fi and I can by-pass that for the sake of the story and for all I know could in fact happen.

I rather enjoy Romulan senate intrigues and word wars. We got an inkling of some of that here. The thing with Romulan settings is always in conveying the political machinations and undercurrents, where every word and sentence can carry a hidden meaning or threat. Things are a little more open here, with a declaration of fault at the feet of the Tal Shiar but perhaps given the dramatic changes to the Empire it is to be expected that not everything remains veiled anymore.

The prodigy warriors are obviously mistrusted for good reason and then given their abilities and self-confidence or insolence they don't exactly win favour for themselves too readily either.

Just watch again, there was a line about carrying the Empire only it said care. You might want to double check and amend that.

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 11 Sep 2011 09:30 Title: STAR TREK: The Dominion Terror Act

You might want to go back and fix the line at the start, "That night, he had not sleep at all." There were also a few instances with gaze that did not read correctly either.

Liking the mystery and the sense of discovery for our character here, looking at everything with new eyes and marvelling at what they see. I liked too the use of the underground and underwater setting as it lent the secretive air to the project as well as giving a rather cinematic scope of transisting from one locale to another via the shuttle.

The chapter title made no sense to me until the end and I assume it relates to the seeming spark between the Tr'Lagga and The Creator, and the unknowing jealousy felt by Sahs'kei. I wonder how this plays into everything.

Reviewer: QueensJenn Signed [Report This]
Date: 28 Aug 2011 01:52 Title: STAR TREK: Dominating Forces

Yay, Tomalak!! Except he's being a jerk. Oh well XD.

I've never seen his voice described as being high, before. I always thought he had a rather deep voice, myself...especially in "Future Imperfect" when he growls "We're wasting time..."

...

*ahem* Right, back to the story.

Can I ask why you gave him a Northern accent? Or was that just completely random? I'm a bit of an accent geek. :D

Author's Response:

Can you honestly say you're surprised he's being a jerk? X)

 

I actually never did see any of the episodes with Tomalak in them (though I always mean to, they're never on). So I based my description of his voice off of books (I do believe one mentioned him having a high voice), and what I pictured myself. As for the Northen accent... It was random, but also wasn't really. I always thought of the North as being where the biggest cities of Romulus being, and Tomalak struck me as a city-slicker, arasticratic sort of soldier.

Reviewer: Nerys Ghemor Signed [Report This]
Date: 24 May 2010 23:07 Title: STAR TREK: Dominating Forces

Damn!  And here I was hoping Occylen would be strong and find some way to resist the memories and become his own person.  I guess my last hope would have to be that Occylen could spy for the Federation--but so far I don't see any sign that he's going to. :-(



Author's Response: Occylen is a strong person, but it would be hard to resist all his memories--and then, how do you say "no" to a huge crowd of people screaming your name? Simple curiousity, and the urge to explore what he could have had became something much much bigger. But fret not! There is always hope! ;)

Reviewer: RobertScorpio Signed [Report This]
Date: 12 Jan 2010 21:24 Title: STAR TREK: Dominating Forces

I too am interested to see how Occylen evolved from this point on. I really like original characters. And finding away to make one become just as important as the 'regulars' is hard to do. I think you're off to a great start...

Rob

Author's Response: I'm glad that you, too, like Occylen. I was worried that he would come across as a forced character with a rather tragic backstory. I'm happy that wasn't the case! :)

Reviewer: Nerys Ghemor Signed [Report This]
Date: 12 Jan 2010 17:42 Title: STAR TREK: Dominating Forces

The start of the Second Dominion War--that's some very grim stuff, and very fitting with what I think the Dominion would be likely to do in a situation like that. :-(

I will be very interested to see what Weyoun has done--and how Occylen is going to come out as a result of this.  I don't know why, but I really find myself liking Occylen and hoping he can find a way to be his own person regardless of what's going on with him.

Something tells me that a key piece of the mystery with him would be to find out where his human DNA came from and how he was created.

Oh, and a question about the rebel Cardassians, and the Borg--are these breakaway groups of their respective powers, rather than ALL of those powers being in on the rebellion?



Author's Response: yeah i knew that something like that would probably be exactly the response the Dominion would have... As for Weyoun and Occylen, they're going to be a rather central part of the next and final chapter and I hope I'll have answered your questions then. And Im glad you like the character of Occylen. :) I never was sure if I managed to flesh him out right.

As for the Cardassian and Borg rebel groups are (were for the Borg) the whole powers, minus of course those some people who might not want war

Reviewer: RobertScorpio Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 Dec 2009 01:24 Title: STAR TREK: Dominating Forces

I haven't read your material before and I think this was a great read. I too wonder if the Borg can be trusted and hope to see where you take this soon....great stuff!

Rob

Author's Response: Thanks, Rob! I'm glad you liked it. And indeed, it is certainly justifiable to not really trust the Borg, considerring their reputation. Hope I'll have answered the questions about the Borg next chapter. Cheers!

Reviewer: Nerys Ghemor Signed [Report This]
Date: 29 Dec 2009 17:29 Title: STAR TREK: Dominating Forces

Weyoun stopped the Q?  My goodness--I wonder how?

And we have a little more explanation now of how the Borg came to ally with the other powers...but I find myself wondering how long the Borg could be trustworthy, and if this extended experience of allying might change their nature any.

Oh, and with Data, I am very glad to see that you let him keep the emotion chip, which apparently he could not in the movies.  (I mean, in Imperfection--oops, I mean Insurrection, he didn't, nor did he seem to in Nemesis.)



Author's Response: Yeah, I plan to get into the Borg in the next chapter, and their alliances. After all, the Borg would be almost necassary to defeat the Dominion, and the Borg certainly know it... As for Weyoun, well, you might be surprised... For Data I felt that it would be more interesting for him to keep his emotions and the obstacles presented by it. It would give more insight on his way of thinking and his handling of emotions in a critical situation.

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Nov 2009 22:01 Title: STAR TREK: The Dominion Terror Act

Oh! That is a startling development. And Kzinti antics! Cool. Hope we see more of them. Really do.  Things are really spicing up with the political situation and it seems something very dangerous is loose. As much as things change, Romulan politics and the machinations of advancement remain the same.



Author's Response: The Kzinti are coming... Mwahahaha... Thanks! As for politics, you'll have to wait for the next chapter.

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Nov 2009 21:07 Title: STAR TREK: The Dominion Terror Act

Fantastic! I loved this. The style. The unfolding point of view. The growing sense of his world. The mystery of his upbringing. The devotion to his Creator. The growing skill and mastery of his training and killer instinct.

I loved how you achieved all of this. I liked the progression to his studies and the oversight he received and how it all developed in quite a logical way.  I also liked how you described him and the weakness inherent in his character is his child-like view of the world. It is  a tempering factor on one so skilled and formidable.

I like too the little tidbits that hint at things greater than his little scope of the world. The others who have met with mysterious fates. How and why? Who killed them? The political situation - Federation as their enemy and the Klingons as per usual. And the little throw away line about the First Generation. Hmmm. Lots to mull over. Great stuff to keep me interested and entertained.           

Atop of which is the rich vocabulary /language and world building you are doing with the Romulan world. I know you may have canon and non-canon [the novels] to maybe draw upon and I wouldn't know enough to say if you are correct in your details or not. Alls I can say is if it feels right, and that it most certainly does. The world you are building is rich in detail and language and I particularly remarked the comment on Ruling Passion and how it ruled our protagonist. You really emoted that well.



Author's Response: Thanks! Yeah, not all of the words are canon, since the canon sources don't have every word. I'll be building up his character and the mystery, so I hope you keep reading Miranda!

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Nov 2009 20:34 Title: STAR TREK: The Dominion Terror Act

A very dark opening to your tale. It promises to be an interesting take on what happens to the Romulans post Red Nova. Very ominious and forboding feel to it but great little touches that sho a very Romulan take on things *ahem* sorry Rihannsu. A great feel to it that is seeting up a promising premise. I'm left thinking where is this going to go? Of course the little line, 'and it may be added that the Federation refused to help until the war’s last days' hints at some very dark and dangerous times for the Federation after the fate that befell Romulus. Lots of intriguing pieces - not least of which the Khellian Squad. They should provide some real teeth to the new and dangerous Romulus.



Author's Response: After I saw XI, I was left wondering what happened to the Romulans afterwords. Trouble is going to be brewing in the Romulan Empire, that's for sure. Thanks for the read!

Reviewer: SLWatson Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Oct 2009 16:12 Title: STAR TREK: Zero Hour

And here, I will wait for Scotty to retrieve them so he can say, "I told ye so." ::snickers:: Intriguing beginning!

Author's Response: Thanks, SLWatson! I'd always thought it would be interesting if the Dominion came in contact with the Federation in Kirk's day. And, a lesson learned by Spock: Listen to Scotty!

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