[Report This]Date: 30 Mar 2009 18:54 Title: Chapter 1
Man, that's an awesome story on so many levels. It needs a bit of work with the grammar/formatting, but the story itself is just fricken amazing. I absolutely loved the way you showed this dystopian society, hitting all of the hallmarks that are almost inevitable when people stop exploring and start just being static.
The little details -- the name corruption, the loss of facts, replaced by mythology and the ending... geez, there's not a single uncool thing about this entire story. It's terrific, and your heart really swells at the end when it's obvious that there are people ready to go out there and remember what it all means.
Author's Response: re:grammar, etc. This was my first story. That's all I have to say.
Date: 03 Feb 2009 16:04 Title: Chapter 1
This is an interesting start to what could be a really nice story/novel. Are you planning to continue it, because I'd like to know what happens in those intervening forty-two years - and for that matter, what happened in the preceding three thousand years.
Author's Response: This was a crack at creating a feeling of "much time passed", but as an early work it hasn't called to me to continue. TY, though!