Date: 16 Sep 2014 00:48 Title: Joined
This was an outstanding introduction to a very promising character. The level of detail you've accomplished in such a short story, combined with its emotional weight, makes me hungry for more.
Well done!
Author's Response: Thanks! Joined was a story that I wanted to write, and I didn't have a character in mind. So I kind of used the story as a way of "guiding" my development of Xeira.
Date: 14 Sep 2014 21:26 Title: Joined
This is a rather interesting look into what is surely a mysterious phase of Trill existence - not only the concept of joining, but also what happens when the symbiont is first joined, or when it comes to (or near) the end of its existence.
Well done and engaging!
Author's Response: Thanks so much :-D
Date: 13 Sep 2014 00:57 Title: Joined
I really enjoyed the story and I liked the way that you presented Xeira as a character as she was awaiting the joining with the Tor symbiont and the emotional turmoil of not getting that particular symbiont. I loved the buildup and the development; you have a great way of expressing your ideas.
After all of that buildup, though... I was a little disappointed by how anti-climactic and slightly off-character Xeira had been. Now that she was joined with Eli, I would have thought the death of a symbiont to rock her on her heels more rather than having the unusually self-centered nature to only think of how lucky she was. In DS9, Jadzia Dax spoke about how the lives of symbionts were probably more sacred than their hosts (at times, but not always) and the loss of a symbiont often meant that it was the loss of more than just one... it was the loss of all those hosts along the way. I have to admit at being a little disappointed with how Xeira Eli reacted to that, and I didn't like her at the end of the story as much as I was liking her in the middle of the story.
I'm hoping to see more writing from you! :)
Author's Response: Thanks for the feedback :-) I tend to include the novel canon (or at least something somewhat similar) in my handling of joined Trill: specifically that the symbiont doesn't die when it's too old, it just returns to the caves to procreate, and to share the knowledge it has with other old symbionts. That makes it far less traumatic of a thing when one can't be joined anymore.
Date: 12 Sep 2014 15:37 Title: Joined
I really enjoyed this tale of yours. The rhythm of your well-chosen words made Xeira and her concerns seem very real. In the end I was glad that she joined with young Eli, who already has a yearning to explore. What better symbiont for a member of Starfleet?
Author's Response: Thank you! I really wanted to make sure that Eli wasn't just a "nothing," if that makes sense. The symbiont has it's own whims and such. Nothing TOO big, just gentle nudging...