Date: 09 Dec 2013 22:04 Title: Chapter 1
I like that the characters in this piece are more bothered by their lack of emotion in response to the loss of this quiet crewman than they are actually emotionally bothered by his death. That feels very authentic, and hopefully they will learn something from it. I also liked the fact that his suicide seemed completely senseless -- no one was aware of whatever secret trauma he was hiding. It just adds to the feeling that this person slipped through all the cracks in life without anyone noticing until he finally left this world completely. And because no one noticed his suffering in life, no one can understand it now.
Nicely done.
Author's Response:
Thank you very much.
Date: 06 Dec 2013 00:12 Title: Chapter 1
Well done Jespah, In Memory of Kelsey Haber was an interested p.o.v. story and you manage to explore both Reed and Deborah Haddon Masterson interaction with Kelsey and the secret of why he kept other people distance.
I think the final scene you do a good job of a making that difficult funeral scene believable awkward and yet you making it touching in it own way.
Author's Response:
Oh, I thank you! You're too kind.
Date: 04 Dec 2013 03:03 Title: Chapter 1
Very touching story, initially it had me at Malcolm being captain and the mere mention of Rotherhithe but deep down a profound story. The comrade we barely knew. Sort of a different "lower decks" take.
Author's Response:
Thanks! The mention of Rotherhithe is because I see Michael Caine as Dr. Morgan.
Date: 29 Nov 2013 03:45 Title: Chapter 1
I wasn't very sure how to approach this piece, so I apologize for the late review. It was very well done, and I'll echo what's been said already to say that it was neat to see a take on this challenge of "remembrance" and "memories" with a story that...has a lack of it. And it's absolutely true - there are always those people that we know their face, we know their name sorta...but we don't really know anything more about them. God knows I felt that way when I got home from my last deployment with all the new people in my squadron, and I'll probably have the same issue this time around, too. It was nice to see at least one person had a brief look into Haber's personal life, and that they really either didn't care, or very gracefully recovered and continued forward - a good Star Trekky thing to do, so it worked well. And yeah, what LBD stated - this was frustrating, to get to the end, and still not really have that "happy ending" where they found SOMEONE who knew the guy well enough to share more than a few words. Good job on this one, as always!
Author's Response:
Aw, thanks! And poor Deb is left being the person who somehow knew him best and ... she's got very nearly nothing.
I wanted him to almost be like the guy you see, like you said, this new face on a deployment, and then suddenly they're gone, and you and your fellows are saying, "Was she Susan or Suzanne? Was he from the South or the Midwest?" And nobody knows anymore. And closure, as we all know, is often sorely lacking.
Thank you for your kind and thoughtful review.
Date: 29 Nov 2013 02:42 Title: Chapter 1
This was a frustrating story - in the best possible way, of course. We've all been there - someone in our class, or our dorm, or in the workplace, whose face we know but that is all. As for their backstory, what makes (or made) them who they are, we haven't a clue. You captured that feeling beautifully. Hopefully this will inspire all of us to at least try to reach out to that lone individual, although I don't think that would've helped in Haber's case - he seemed to welcome the solitude and anonymity. A thought-provoking piece to be sure.
Author's Response:
Thank you - he was kind of a cipher to me, too, truth be told. I had really only barely identified him, in Detached Curiosity ... as being someone where people weren't sure of his sexuality, but that was it.
And then this happens, and there's no note, and you wonder wtf just happened and who that person really was.
Thank you for your kind review.
Date: 22 Nov 2013 12:42 Title: Chapter 1
No resolution. No answers. Sometimes memories of people are like that. God knows, I've got a few "unresolved" people in my past. Thus far, you've got my vote for the challenge.
Author's Response:
Oh my! Thank you.
And thank you very much for reading! :)