You must login (register) to review.
Reviewer: Enterprise1981 Signed [Report This]
Date: 03 Jan 2014 23:19 Title: Chapter 3

Nice alternate version to one of the classic Voyager episodes. I agree with trekfan that it's nice not to see Andy Dick this time around. He seemed to have the innovations Voyager's Doc was outfitted with, yet still had the same personality traits as Zimmerman.

All that aside, seems that Starfleet has gotten far more militarized and this ship's crew has gotten to be a paranoid as the Romulans from the original version.

Reviewer: Enterprise1981 Signed [Report This]
Date: 03 Jan 2014 23:15 Title: Chapter 2

I have a feeling this is going to be a very complex story featuring all of the TNG-era crews. Things could still get a little dicey with Picard's negotiations to bring the Romulans into war.

Reviewer: Enterprise1981 Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 Dec 2013 22:49 Title: Chapter 1

Again, nice alternate spin on Section 31's efforts to recruit Bashir.

I also had a feeling there would be Bajorans like Naral in Starfleet, whose families had long ago fled their homeworld. I trust she's one those who "accepts the distortion of their name in order to assmiliate" as Laren Ro put it.

Reviewer: trekfan Signed [Report This]
Date: 09 Aug 2013 06:46 Title: Chapter 3

Perfect. This was a great episode ... minus Andy Dick. No.

But you got the tone right here and the Doctor's clear confusion about being accused as a Founder really registers to me. He doesn't know what the hell he's just walked into and I'm dying to see how you write the reaction of the VOY crew.

Reviewer: FalseBill Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Jul 2013 22:27 Title: Chapter 2

Good choice for the divert point as it was so nearly what changed the war course.
Intriguing story captain sarine, nice choice to give DS9 a bajoran commander who has rejected her people faith and gone to S31.

Also sending Picard to meet Spock (and his clone?) feels right but will Picard do what is need to get the Romulans in the war. Three ships to defend the critical array, shows the Federation is broken.
Be interesting to see how this develops.

Reviewer: jespah Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Jul 2013 22:32 Title: Chapter 2

Oh, that's rough.

I'm curious - I suppose this is pre-Nemesis, but I had thought that the Enterprise-E came into existence at the end of Nemesis. Maybe I'm wrong. But everything else is certainly pre-Nemesis, from the existence of Data to Will Riker being the First Officer, rather than Martin Madden.

Good sense of dread and foreboding, making the reader wonder what will happen next. So, what will happen next?

Reviewer: jespah Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Jul 2013 22:22 Title: Chapter 1

Ah, and so it is revealed!

I will not give specifics so as to keep from sullying the surprise. But man oh man! Naral is ... difficult, let's just say. There's a nice word for her - difficult.

But I do have to say that I agree with her, in some ways, about her assessment of the station. It does seem as if things went a little caca, and that they did so many more times than once.

And Julian, cripes - he needs to rein things in. A lot.

Reviewer: jespah Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Jul 2013 22:15 Title: Prologue

Oopsie - well, this is bad. The PADD was not that well secured though - that much should be pretty obvious, yes? 

It is an ugly result, to be sure, but it makes one wonder about its cause. Could it, perhaps, have been prevented somehow?

Reviewer: trekfan Signed [Report This]
Date: 07 Jun 2013 16:10 Title: Chapter 2

Oh, nicely done. You managed to clean up Insurrection nicely here, bringing Paris into the fold (He reminds me of Mr. Magoo), who brings news of Spock. You get the TNG feeling of "one tight knit crew" down here, as Riker and co. are def together through thick and thin.

Riker being promoted to captain, Picard and Troi heading out ... boy, it seems people are gonna be getting killed soon.

Reviewer: trekfan Signed [Report This]
Date: 07 Jun 2013 15:50 Title: Chapter 1

Oh, my, Naral is an uber-bitch, isn't she? I guess that what makes her cover so effective. The way Bashir is suffering from depression, guilt, and drinking it away is a pretty effective way to show how Jack's play has effected him.

 

Then we have Sloan. S31 being involved can only mean they're up to something no good. They're never up to anything good. Sloan hasn't aged well though ... I wonder if teh war effort is as taxing as it appears on him.

Reviewer: Mistral Signed [Report This]
Date: 06 Jun 2013 13:02 Title: Chapter 1

Section 31 took out the Federation? Oh, brilliant if that's where you are going with this...

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 02 Jun 2013 17:29 Title: Chapter 1

Oh my goodness! Sloane! Trying to co-opt Julian onto his side. Wow. Hadn't seen that coming. It makes some sense of Naral's appointment that she has been managed in some manner by S31 in order to do their bidding and they pulled secret strings to get her into the position. But man oh, still did not see that coming.

On Bashir, nice (not nice but you know what I mean) to see that he is feeling a lot guilt over what has happened and is in a bad shape over it all. Turning to drink and no doubt frustrated and dejected by the inability to awaken Sisko. That would surely be something he would blame himself for also and I rather imagine in the past it would have been something he would have stayed up awake for with no sleep until he figured out a way. But no, he is busy downing drinks and seems very much a drunken man. Perhaps a man who will indeed be suspectible to the lure of S31.

The general state of things seems dire enough if Starfleet is essentially divided by the advances of the Dominion. The Jack Pack's ramifications are felt already and keenly.

The nature of Naral seems explained by her S31 connection. It just seems that it was such an odd choice to put in as station commander. Unless Starfleet Command thought being Bajoran of birth was qualification enough. Or perhaps they wanted someone who was not going to follow Sisko's tenure of command in the same way and cause certain levels of problems.

Should be interesting to see how this all plays out. It must be said, this already is not the direction I thought things might go. Not that I ever expect you to take things in a direction I'd otherwise expect.

Reviewer: kes7 Signed [Report This]
Date: 02 Jun 2013 05:13 Title: Chapter 1

Ah, Section 31.  They always turn up exactly when you don't want them.  

Naral started off a just a bitch.  Now she's an evil bitch.

Reviewer: Enterprise1981 Signed [Report This]
Date: 01 Jun 2013 23:13 Title: Chapter 1

What really stands out in this chapter is that Bashir is in a really bad way after his role in the latest disaster. The other big twist is the new CO's efforts to recruit Bashir into Section 31.

Something sure did seem a little off about Naral, more from giving Kira the cold shoulder and her take on Bajoran theology than her lack of an earring. That should make for an interesting dynamic.

Reviewer: Enterprise1981 Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2013 23:14 Title: Prologue

That was quite an amazing teaser. I had to read Bashir's first scene twice to understand how Sarina was both in the cargo bay and accompanying the Jack Pack. The usual bickering between Damar and Weyoun was sure spot on, throwing Damar's inner conflict from "Statistical Probalities" that was harbinger to his eventual defection. Makes me wonder about direction of Damar's character in this universe. Knowing that Cardassia's status in the new galactic order be reduced even more, will he try to dissociate Cardassia from the Dominion in this timeline as well?

I came across this story while watching "The Best of Both Worlds" for the umpteenth time, so that last passage gives this prologue the same feel as the end of BoBW, Part 1.

Author's Response: Wow, thanks! Great to get such praise from one of the site's resident DS9-ophiles! I love all of these characters and writing Damar and Weyoun is a joy. I have not yet entirely decided where I want Damar to go in this universe, but watch this space! Any comparison to BOBW is a fantastic honour, so thanks for that as well! Hope you enjoy the rest.

Reviewer: kes7 Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2013 07:43 Title: Prologue

Oh, man.  Well played.  Very, very well played.  This is about the worst possible outcome of the Statistical Probabilities potential universes, and it is all so very believable ... if just one tiny thing had gone differently, everything would indeed be different.  Multiply that by a few more differences and we're well established on the highway to hell.

I can't imagine the recriminations and regret that must be going through Julian's mind right now.  

On a technical level, this was extremely well written, which is usual for you.  The character voices were spot on.  I could hear their voices just like I was watching the show ... but the ending was so much darker.

Really very well done.  I'm looking forward to this.  (And also kind of dreading it because I know it can't end happily!)



Author's Response: Thanks kes. Statistical Probabilities is one of my favourite episodes, the Jack Pack especially I thought were great characters and fantastic foils for Julian. When I was developing Restoration, I watched a lot of DS9 (for obvious reasons) and I got a flash while watching the end of this episode - what if Sarina had not stayed behind? Julian is going to struggle with what happened here for a long time, and by the time we get around to seeing him again... Let's just say he may not be the Julian you all remember anymore. Thank you so much for the comment, glad you thought that the character voices worked - I'm working on a TNG chapter right now, which is much more difficult. I think I know their voices much less than I do the DS9 ones! I should have some more up soon!

Reviewer: trekfan Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2013 05:45 Title: Prologue

Man, this is the turning point. This is what sends the AQ and everything else down the drain … all of this, all of this is because of Jack and his friends. Out of all the turning points in the war, I didn’t peg this one as the one that sent everything down the tubes. After all, there were a lot of points that you could have picked to be the big one but this was inspired. I liked this episode and the Jack Pack quite a lot. The characters were flawed, messed up, but each had a redeeming quality.

But here you turn everything on its head and you do so in a nice fashion. You have the DS9 characters down to a T and write them all very well, from Bashir to Damar, these guys looked and sounded like the real deal. Jack and his mannerisms were strongest of all to me, as you nailed him and did it in fine form. I’m eagerly anticipating to seeing what happens to … well, everyone! Picard and Janeway … gracious there has to be so much going on in the future, the possibilities are quite numerous and exciting. How does it all go down? Who live and dies?

More, please.  



Author's Response: Hi trekfan. Yeah, as I said above, this one came to me while watching the episode. It just seemed to fit perfectly and to allow me the most freedom to maintain the majority of the characters (many other events meant a massive immediate loss of life especially on DS9). I'm glad you liked the episode and the Jack Pack, it is one of my favourite episodes as well. The DS9 characters were actually really easy to write, although I'm struggling with the TNG characters (which surprised me somewhat). As to seeing everyone, I am hoping to include as many characters as possible over the course of the series, although at the moment I am concentrating on the big ones. The series itself is going to be called Fate of the Fallen, so it is important to see all of those fates play out. More tonight for sure, though it may be a bit longer between updates after that.

Reviewer: Miranda Fave Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2013 03:23 Title: Prologue

Man, this is going to be epic. Isn't it?

I just know it will be. I have that tingling sensation.

I am thrilled that you are going to explore such an important and captivating era of your universe. The Fall of the Federation damnably fascinating and we've been given big teases over the course of Redemption. Seems we may now at last get some of the blanks filled in. Yes you're ficlets only served to make those questions all the more evocative and make us itch for more.

All the canon characters were dealt with nicely and I like the point that you use to diverge things in the universes, how the Jack Pack end up bringing about the ruin of the Federation by their actions.



Author's Response: Hi MF! Yes, I think epic is probably the word for what I have planned here. Tragedy works as well :) I have been kicking over the idea of writing this for a while (in fact I had begun it over on trekbbs a few years ago but never continued with it) but the reaction to the Dax ficlets pushed me over the edge. I'm glad that you're so enthusiastic to see how this develops, I hope to surprise you all with the way things play out. Yeah, the Jack Pack are a turning point, and things will play out very differently from this point on.

You must login (register) to review.