Date: 23 Dec 2013 05:48 Title: Silent Running
Ah, I love a good Worf story. Especially a story about Worf and Jadzia (even indirectly here). I will never forgive DS9 for killing her off and messing up Worf when he finally found happiness. The way you describe the readying for battle was superb here. Tense, but a sense of anticipation, and then the way Worf just goes in there and does his thing. He's a badass and I loved watching him work.
It was sad to see his comrade go down, but that's what's necessary in war. You lose the ones you don't want to. His friend died honorably and this story, though short, was a pleasure to read. Well done.
Date: 06 Dec 2011 22:23 Title: Silent Running
Oh nice. I like this. I think it was the personal pitting of Worf's desire to earn Jadzia her place in Sto-vo-kor against the machinations of the Dominion forces and obviously Gowron's attempts to have Martok destroyed and ruined in one horrendous action after the other that gave this a particular edge.
But additionally, you started it with a Klingon strike force, moving stealthily, quietly, with no commands, shouts or roars; instead that moment comes as a break in the middle, the noise, the roar, the clash all at once and battle is joined. It made for an effective piece, moreso when there is no dialogue in the piece until the end and that is a dying voice adding to the sense of silence to the tale. I liked the overall structure of the piece and how it played out, I probably would have loved more to the beginning, building it up, expanding on the hike, but then it might have been harder to not be too artifical in not having dialogue until the ending. Regardless, this was really well done.
Date: 02 Dec 2011 22:23 Title: Silent Running
One of the things I like about your story is that there is very little dialog, just a tiny bit of clarification at the very end. And I think that's how, generally, these responses should be - this is, after all, silence that we are exploring.
A battle/assassination attempt also makes sense as a topic for exploration. I think we've all seen similar scenes, and not just in Trek, where soldiers move quietly to encircle and often ambush an enemy. The use of knives (such as you had) or garroting maintains the silence. The people who engage in these activities aren't necessarily bloodthirsty but they definitely have to have nerves of steel and experience. It's not the time for self-doubt or a moral dilemma.
Qqi'kla is a great character, etched well with very few strokes. It's a great economy of verbiage. I'm mindful of the idea of - edit until a story bleeds, that it would scream if you cut any more from it. I feel you've accomplished that rather nicely.
Date: 02 Dec 2011 05:25 Title: Silent Running
As soon as I started reading I began to wonder if you'd kill Hesar and somehow I doubted it ;) Still, not being sure created some suspence.
It's "refreshing" to see that the "good guys" don't always win. Life isn't as simple as it would seem on TV and this mission wasn't simple or successful either. And since I don't know the film the story is based on, I could enjoy it fully :)