Date: 12 Feb 2012 22:58 Title: Chapter 7
Oh fascinating stuff here. As always, your characters face difficult choices and you keep building on the themes of trust, loyalty, and duty. You keep paring down the relationships and characters of the story. Getting to the nub of the story yet with lots of little questions and intrigues to keep us on our toes. Super.
I had such high hopes for Damar but now Dukat is trying to convince him that what he is doing is for the good of Cardassia, I worry that Dukat's charms might work yet again on Damar. I think at times there may be something hopeful about Damar and that he hopes to see the best in Dukat. But will he be willing to trust Dukat still or will he use caution and the courage of his own convictions and betray the traitor.
Dukat is playing a dangerous game and by opening up to Damar is showing his cards a little - this is a sign of trust from Dukat but it is also part of his schemes no doubt to fold Damar into his plans and to keep an even closer eye on the one man who might be able to bring Dukat down.
Meantime, everybody else are taking risks in choosing to act and choosing to share their information. One betrayal is all it will take to have their plans foiled and to ensure Dukat suceeds. Given the degree of mistrust and the just cause by many not to trust certain figures, it is fast becoming a complicated situation of trust and the need to get more support.
Another superb chapter in this engrossing tale.
Author's Response:
You're right, there's a lot of secrets and sharing with wrong people could be disastrous and ruin all plans. More than that--it could get many people executed.
What Damar will do and what's his attitude to his mentor and his plans? You'll see :)
Date: 07 Feb 2012 18:05 Title: Chapter 7
Ah, a new undercurrent. Who is (perhaps I missed this name) the political agent? And can he really be trusted?
Author's Response:
His name wasn't metioned in this story yet, but he is a character that you know from "The Shadow of the Order." Whether he can be trusted...you have to wait and see or try to guess who that might be ;)
Date: 05 Feb 2012 00:03 Title: Chapter 6
Yay for Damar. he is showing a courage here that took some time to emerge in the Prime Universe. All of them are showing courage because they know thye have to act for the good of Cardassia and do not trust Dukat to be working for the good of it or them. But to challenge his authority is to risk a lot - this is getting very dangerous.
Author's Response:
This is happening about 20 years after the "Dominion War" (which of course didn't happen here), so Damar has been serving with Dukat for over 20 years. He had sufficient time to see through the gul and to mature to be able to make his own decisions and be a man we know him from the end of the show.
And this is getting very dangrous indeed.
Thanks for reading :)
Date: 04 Feb 2012 23:03 Title: Chapter 5
Oh my god. That was a horrible situation there and the fear is palpable on the bridge. They live in fear of Dukat with his false smiles and his hold over them. I wouldn't be surprised if Dukat knew that Damar worried for the safety of the crew and that this was an added leverage to keep the useful Damar around.
Damar, is of course, quite fascinating a character here in such a dire situation. He wants to be elsewhere and understands that Dukat is not an advancement in his career but a hinderance. But to seek a transfer would probably not just leave the crew unprotected, I imagine it would incur Dukat's own brand of wrath and that punishment of some form would be engineered.
Another impressive chapter Rejal. Loving this story.
Author's Response:
Somehow, Damar grew to be a very important and one of major characters in this story. He was supposed to be important and he has a big role to play, but I didn't think he'd get so much attention and be in the spotlight that often ;)
Date: 04 Feb 2012 22:27 Title: Chapter 4
Uh oh. So soon they run into the Dominion. This cannot be good. Dukat did wonders for helping to bring ruin on the AQ when he made alliance with the Dominion in the Prime Universe. What disaster might he bring upon it by making first contact?
Firstly, I like though how Jarol superceded Dukat by following his orders and disseminating the information about the Bajoran colony. Ha! Unfortunately, it served to get her corrected by Dukat. it might act as a mark against her in the future.
For the present though he forgives her 'her mistake' and invites her to dinner. A thoroughly unpleasant evening I am sure. One wrong word and she might have herself executed. It also bodes ill for her that Dukat seems to be trying to court Jarol. Not nice at all.
Then back to contact with the Dominion. They seem no less aggressive in this timeline - things are playing out in a similiar fashion with the Bajoran colony obliterated. That is not good. But strangely, we see how there could almost be a potential for the Cardassians and Bajorans to come together in order to muster their strength. However, with Dukat at the helm, I fear things will not go that way.
Author's Response:
Dukat shows his "gratiousness" by forgiving her the "mistake" she'd made. Oh, how gratious he is! Not! For a moment his charm probably made her forget who she was dealing with and the dinner wasn't as bad, but I think soon she realised she had fallen into a trap and he knew how to manipulate her to lower her guard.
That's exactly what happened with New Bajor--the Dominion destroyed it in this timeline too. This part of the galaxy wasn't influenced by the destruction of Vulcan, so the Dominion is as nasty as we know it. The Bajorans paid the price.
Date: 04 Feb 2012 21:47 Title: Chapter 3
Oh, yes, she rolled her eyes. ‘I’m a Lakarian; you know, the artistic and cultured Cardassian.’ Lakarian feeling of cultural superiority sometimes got on her nerves. Had she ever shown a farmland superiority of ‘we feed you’ complex?
Now that, right there, is just why I love your Cardassians. There's something definite and different about each one - differing personalities, tones, tempers, prejudices, ambitions, hopes and loves. This wee paragraph gave a window to the simple differences and even tensions among the general Cardassian populace. Yet, despite this, they all remain distinctly Cardassian. In other words, they are all great characters - who just happen to be Cardassian in a Cardassian setting and story. Bravo.
Now onto a particular character - of course Dukat. You make him the perfect slimeball and nail the dialogue I can imagine dripping from the canon TV Dukat. You give the reader enough to imagine his sly way and flattering manner, he presumes no one can see through, as if he were some sort of masterful orator or politican. Instead, he a mean, hungry scrub of a worm with only his own petty ambitions and desires. I fear and pity for Jarol having garnered his attentions. Terrific stuff.
Author's Response:
I try to make my Cardassian diverse, just like us, humans, are diverse on our planet. They might seem all the same to aliens, but among themselves they can see all little and big differences between them. I'm happy it works out :)
Dukat, oh yes. Not a person you want to be around ;)
I try to write the dialogue with him fit the show. If I can't imagine Marc Alaimo in make-up saying it and doing it, then it's not right and I try to change. I'm not sure it always works, but it's good to see that it somehow does.
Date: 28 Jan 2012 00:11 Title: Chapter 2
Oh crumbs! Or at least, that is what I thought when I saw they were going to visit Bajor. Especially when Jarol and Dukat took in the nature and abundance of life on the planet. It screamed out the possibility that Dukat would chase after Bajor to help Cardassia. But he didn't. (Yet)
Another fascinating chapter - mostly because of how we got to see the first contact between Bajor and Cardassia in this AU - and with Dukat of all people! It felt almost like a powder keg moment where Dukat would possibly ruin everything.
I love though how it turns on Zammerman and his distrust of Dukat and how Jarol proves just how much Dukat is pathetic and yet dangerously ambitious in how he framed the lie about the Bajoran presence through the wormhole. Man that man's pride and ego is so big, I wonder will he be able to fit his head through the wormhole!
Another great chapter.
Author's Response:
Dukat always had a great ego and since in this AU some things changed only a little, so did he. Maybe he became more greedy ;) Where it'll take him, you'll in in following chapters.
Date: 10 Dec 2011 21:30 Title: Chapter 1
You know what impresses me greatly when I start one of your stories? It is that after even one chapter one feels involved in the story - the political machinations and the emotional lives of the characters. You have a way of imbuing history and personality into the characters and add the entire dimension here to them with the family scene added to the duty scenes.
Then we come to the story itself. Again, like Neo... you take the challenge of writing in the AOS universe, making everything old new again, turning thinngs on their head and subverting them, yet within familar contexts that have us asking questions and what ifs and hoping that really bad things will not happen here. Alas, with Dukat in the frame, I fear that is exactly what is going to happen. If stepping on Federation toes isn't enough of a gamble, they have taken on an ambitious and dangerous Gul in Dukat who simply cannot be trusted - so much so that even Cardassians who are sticklers for the command structure and hierarchy are willing to subvert it to keep a check on Dukat. This should prove very interesting to see how it all plays out.
Now of course, there are questions galore to be asked. Just what will be found on the other side of the wormhole. We know in the Prime Universe it was the eventual fate to discover the Dominion and plunge the Alpha Quadrant into war. I'm betting that given your ability to subvert things that we are going to find something like that but it won't be the Dominion we know. It will be fascinating to learn just what they discover. And of course, there is the curious or ominous fact that the Federation have not claimed a right to the region. Does that suggest they discovered something better left alone? And of course, off in the direction of the Romulan Empire does that mean they risk war or Romulan interference? Fascinating.
Author's Response:
Beginning of writing is always the most difficult for me. I always fear it would be boring before the action starts and discourage people from continuing. I'm glad that at least in some stories it wasn't the case :)
Gul Dukat has a reputation. They got rid of him from Cardassia Prime and now the problem is on Zamarran's--as second in command of the team--shoulders. This chapter also shows a bit more about the other characters. You know about them from Prime Universe, so you can compare how different they are due to some changes in their lives. Jarol didn't lose her second husband, Brenok didn't lose his family, and the Obsidian Order tries to keep control over everyone and everything.
The Dominion...that question will be answered very soon :)
Thank you for reading and reviewing! :)
Date: 05 Dec 2011 22:56 Title: Chapter 4
Man oh man, Dukat's an oily SOB, eh?
I'm a little surprised that Jarol relaxed at all. She knows he's a womanizer (at least, I think she does), she's just seen him lie and she really wants to return to her ship. Frankly, I was expecting her to be checking a PADD (or its equivalent) every few minutes or tapping her foot or otherwise showing signs that she wanted to be anywhere but there.
And - eek! - Weyoun! I have not seen a lot of Deep Space Nine but I do know that the Jem'Hadar and the Vorta are rather slippery beings. Plus there's the unquestioned destruction of the colony - announced so matter-of-factly! Very chilling - hey, like Nazi concentration camp commandants, they were only following orders.
Brr.
Author's Response:
Kira, for whom Gul Dukat was nothing else but a butcher of her people, fell for his charm...twice. So I thought that Jarol could be charmed by him too, because he isn't such a monster for her. It only shows that Dukat knows how to charm women and most of them are helpless when he starts.
Slippery is a perfect word for Weyoun.
Jem'Hadar destroyed that colony in canon universe, too. We can see that the Dominion is the same, regardless of destruction of Vulcan.
Date: 29 Nov 2011 23:00 Title: Chapter 3
I love the Lakarian versus farmland hint of a rivalry!
And Dukat takes Jarol! Egad, how obvious can the old lecher get?
I like the trip through the wormhold, although here's where visual aids might have been helpful, to truly see the wonder out there.
Author's Response:
I'd planned to write quite a detailed description of the wormhole through Brenok's eyes, but I couldn't make a sentence. I think he didn't want to share, so after being stuck for weeks, I just gave up and went on.
Dukat? How obvious he could get? Just wait and see...ugh...
Date: 22 Nov 2011 22:53 Title: Chapter 2
Fascinating that they don't know about the Bajorans! Welcome to the alt universe, indeed!
The idea that the wormhole is inhabited by the Prophets - is that canon, or close to it? And we're starting to see Dukat as what he is - he strikes me as a bit of a Napoleon, kind of having to overly prove himself. Nervous "leaders" with low self-esteem, who feel they have to continually show how great they are - those people often get their underlings killed. I fear for the lower decks!
Author's Response:
The Prophets living in the wormhole is canon. And the Cardassians didn't know about Bajor, because they weren't allowed to expand in this direction--one of their treaty conditions after a lost war with the Romulans.
Dukat...you are right, he means trouble.
Date: 22 Nov 2011 22:51 Title: Chapter 1
I like the start. You've got a wormhole, and the Federation has been there and back - so why aren't they trying to claim it for their own? That's rather fishy, and it piques interest quickly.
And then - it is, perhaps, a ploy to get Dukat out of the way. Oops, we just lost him, uh ... somewhere. And Dukat the womanizer! How very interesting.
The dinner was sweet, and I liked that the kids are, tentatively, checking each other out - a good memory for Jarol to take with her into the unknown.
Author's Response:
Dukat had a huge appetite for Bajoran women, so I suppose even with the lack of Bajorans, his appetite was not smaller. It was big enough to get him into trouble on more than one occasion.
I'm glad you liked the dinner. It was supposed to the a warm moment :)
Thanks for reading :)