Date: 31 May 2014 16:05 Title: The Fleet Meet
This is quite an interesting look at what should be a routine meeting of all senior brass, and then some relaxing R&R. I like the interaction between Beth and her XO, Dryden, and then later, her husband.
Captain Jerbin is more a character that one likes to dislike. Don't we all know people like this--people who seem to poison the air they breathe, and for no apparent reason? I've known several and none of them belong in positions of authority, but unfortunately, sometimes, that's where they end up.
I have to think that Beth isn't the reason Jerbin's son isn't speaking to him, but rather that the son might first have been torn between loyalty to his father and his Captain, who he sees is a good CO, and then starts to see his father for who he is, and realizes that this view Jerbin holds of Beth is skewed by his own attitude. Maybe she'll get promoted before him, and can then sanction his behavior because she outranks him. I know he's been a Captain longer, but people like that sometimes hold themselves back because of their view of the world. One can hope.
You captured the complexities of the emotional responses to such an event beautifully, and this story drew me in and made me want to read more. I'll be checking out the series. Bravo!
Date: 29 May 2014 23:52 Title: ST: Heritage: A Response to Three Easy Steps
I don't understand where my review for this is. I've read this bit at least before. I'm sure of it. Alas, it is again neat to revisit. So much I love about your Heritage story and your writing. You somehow make a person very much at home with it. You invute them in. Like Beth and her Tiger (love the pet name), you allow them to revel in the blanket of your stories.
There's somethig irrascipble about Beth, she's flirty and teasing and fun and I suppose that makes her very much like her father and no wonder her Risa reputation then. However, she also seems to have his early drive and determination with blinkers on so that she ignored and/or missed tristian's advances and falling for her. She didn't let herself see him. Which is sad in some ways but maybe the time and the advancement of their careers allows them to avoid the mistakes made by her parents in their youthful relationship. Maybe that's why and how B&T can get on the same page (if not on the same bed each night) in their relationship now.
Date: 29 May 2014 04:34 Title: Flawed Like Me
Terilynn, I want to tell you that I really loved this story.
First off, the scene setting is very good, it comes across naturally and in very few words. You went into detail where you needed to and, when you didn't need to, you didn't. A lot of writers would have either over-explained or under-explained. You really hit a good balance here. Your vision was well communicated without robbing the reader of his or her imagination.
The message and the point also came across extremely well. You got across Cassidy's feelings of imperfection and perhaps unworthiness by having her identify with the ruined candy sculpture. It was also disturbing to see Will (I admit I have never liked the character) characterize Deanna as 'perfect'. For a child who feels imperfect, to be told that Mommy is perfect, and to utterly believe all of Daddy's pronouncements, opinions, and judgments, is a recipe for gutted self-esteem. And to know that Cassidy is already getting therapy only adds to the punch.
I have something similar (it is actually a chapter of a far longer book) where a character talks about how a terraformed world was deliberately populated only with beautiful birds. It is all peacocks and bluebirds and it is lovely, but the ecosystem is collapsing. And this is all happening because plain old bug-eating sparrows were not allowed on the planet. The character, who sees herself (and others see her this way as well) as plain, is emotionally affected by this. When the person she is telling this to tells her that she is identifying with the sparrows, she agrees. When they become lovers, this person calls her Sparrow, and the name is meaningful because it is a reminder that imperfection can, in its own way, be quite beautiful.
Mary Sues have no such problems. But you have no Mary Sue here.
Very well done indeed.
Date: 27 Mar 2014 22:43 Title: The Fleet Meet
An Interesting look into Beth and Tristan world and the complexity of married Captains.
You did a fine job (as usual) of setting a nice peaceful scene of showing the two at peace with their world and preparing for some good R&R, only for the mood to be ruin by Captain Jerbin.
You make him seem a unpleasant Captain, that Starfleet must have a few of, one who might have a valid reason for a grudge against Will Riker with the death of his wife, but I suspect his estrangement from his son is due to failing to see Beth for the Captain she rather than the name she bears.
Another enjoyable read from the star writer of the G&T show.
Author's Response: Thank you so very much FB! Getting reviews like this make me yearn to write more. <3
Date: 13 Jan 2014 12:18 Title: ST: Heritage: A Response to Three Easy Steps
Nice story. A reflection of sorts.
Date: 16 Jul 2013 23:04 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
Good that the relations with the doctor are starting to normalize, too. Beth needs her crew, and they have got to get along. I imagine there is an adjustment period for all concerned.
Date: 16 Jul 2013 22:56 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
Ah, and it appears as if the issues with Enya might be beginning to hit a resolution. Again, a gentle admonishment, and again a promise to do better. Hopefully, it will take this time as Beth really does not need this on top of everything else that's going on.
Date: 16 Jul 2013 22:48 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
Good job by Beth setting Enya straight. She's right; it's inappropriate. And pretty damned creepy. This is not the way that any counselor should behave and, truth be told, it is the sort of behavior that should make Command think twice about assigning any more Betazoids as counselors, ever - and possibly in any other capacity. It is just far too much of a violation and it is the sort of thing that can absolutely murder crew morale.
Date: 26 Jun 2013 23:03 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
Not sure what I can say that is truly new.
I enjoy this book. The Era of the Enterprise-G is rich and alive. You've caught existing character voices well and I can believe in Beth as Will/Deanna Daughter.
I like the original aliens and the black sheep sister threat.
The mixing of history interlude and 'G' Era, make it an easy read with the reveal about past actions helping. Hope to see more of the old Enterprise and titan crews in your other stories.
Yes forward, forever forward!
Author's Response: Thank you for the review FalseBill! I appreciate the feedback very much and yes, I'm currently working on Book Two.
Date: 19 Jun 2013 21:38 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
I like how Worf at least initially took it on as something of a practical joke versus Riker, that it was something that amused him. But of course he had to have seen just how serious Beth was.
The parallel here is clear, that this bit of the interlude is rather close to the prior year's interlude with Picard before his retirement. Another sweet nod to canon with the naming of the skiff after Shran.
Date: 19 Jun 2013 21:32 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
And the tradition continues, as Jean-Luc Picard is given the opportunity to behave in a way that was denied him otherwise in life - as a patriarch, and not as a captain. Nice nod to canon with Kirk's words from Generations and the mentionings of Archer and Spock as well. No mentioning of April and Pike, but it is not necessary to play every single one of the greatest hits.
Date: 19 Jun 2013 21:28 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
The interweaving of Black Sabbath is very affecting here, and Beth's distress is believable, as is Deanna's offense. For Deanna, it is as if her own, personal existence is in question. What mother wouldn't be hurt by such a thing?
And then there's Cassidy, the obvious black sheep of the family.
Date: 19 Jun 2013 21:13 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
Ah, the family reunion! I really liked how Beth blocks her mother's voice out of her own head. It is a bit reminiscent of Deanna and Lwaxana, and it makes the reader wonder - is Deanna, in some ways, turning into her mother?
Date: 19 Jun 2013 20:55 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
The surprise is lovely, but I do have my doubts that the captaincy of the flagship would not be the subject of a news story. I think the Rikers would have learned, somehow, that Beth was in command.
Date: 19 Jun 2013 20:48 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
For Beth, who has the weight of tradition and family and expectations on her shoulders, her education could not have been at all easy. So many damned expectations! It makes sense that a Klingon would notice that, and would notice the way she had handled herself.
The original aliens are interesting. You had to convey a lot of information in this section, and I think it was gotten across just fine.
Date: 18 Jun 2013 22:44 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
Beth's got a bombshell bit of news, it sounds - but it just scared the tar out of poor Bill. I loved the Choblik - I take it that is an original species. Very alien, very different, but also sympathetic and easy to be comfortable with.
Bill's fear is very real, as is Laura's. I get the feeling he'll be a bit peeved at Beth for scaring him like this.
Date: 18 Jun 2013 22:38 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
Oh man! You started this off with a bang!
The tapping and the feeling of, ho hum, this is kind of routine, zipping straight to horror, is very well done.
Date: 24 Nov 2012 23:05 Title: Flawed Like Me
I don't honestly know how I missed this story but damn ... that's just a perfect little scene to describe Cass. Well done, Terlynn, well done.
Author's Response: TF!! Wow! How nice of you! I love getting reviews, even so long after I've written a piece! Glad you enjoyed it. Cass will be getting more coverage as soon as I find a way out of a certain corner I've written her brother into. XD Sigh.
Date: 27 Oct 2011 13:21 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
I can't help but ask is USS Walesa is from Wałęsa, former president of Poland, but without Polish letters, or it's just a coincidence.
Author's Response: It is him, without the Polish letters (alas, my American keyboard and editor did not have them.) I created the ship and the class in my head. All my classes of ships not only have the class named after the first ship (in this case Walesa) named after them, but all the ships in the class adhere to the theme. I have posted my reference list here at Ad Astra - I would have posted the timeline, but I integrated the next two books timeline into it and don't want to give too many spoilers. ;) Thanks for continuing to read!
Date: 25 Oct 2011 13:39 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
I'm not surprised that Beth looks for "refuge" in a calm, composed Vulcan presence and mind. It's good there's someone aboard to whom she can turn to and that he understands her needs.
Date: 25 Oct 2011 13:37 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
"…TO BOLDLY GO WHERE NO ONE HAS GONE BEFORE."
"FORWARD. ALWAYS FORWARD."
Nice, really nice! :)
Date: 25 Oct 2011 13:35 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
Those ghosts sound very much like Jem'Hadar, though th smell and "not killing nature" is not something I usually associate with Jem'Hadar. I wonder where it's all going... :)
Date: 18 Oct 2011 05:52 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
I'm glad to see that Enya understood her mistake without long speeches and preaching. That shows she can improve and her regret is a sign she wants to do everything not to repeat it.
And the joke about the lasagna? I laughed, too :D
Author's Response: You will see more of the Riker father/daughter relationship being exposed as Beth and her crew get more comfortable with him being on the Enterprise. While Beth was always inspired by Picard to succeed - her command style is identical to that of her father's.
Date: 18 Oct 2011 04:40 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
I think Beth was right--Enya crossed the line. "Eavesdropping" other people's conversation behind a closed door leads to nothing good and I'm quite surprised that Enya doesn't understand that. Maybe her former COs asked her to do that, but when they did, didn't she have any objections and just accepted it as a natural thing?
Beth's going to have a lot of problems with a counselor who doesn't understand other people's basic needs--like the need of privacy.
Author's Response: Enya learns the lesson well. She got lazy. The scene is meant to solidify a few things for the reader, Beth's aversion to her own Betazoid skills; Priest's "over-reliance" on her own Betazoid skills; Richardson's blooming (albeit subtle here) fondness for Beth; and the fractured professional relationship between Richardson & Priest. This comes into play a bit in the future of the tale.
Date: 15 Oct 2011 14:19 Title: ST: HERITAGE - Book One, A Break with Tradition
That's a great idea with those interludes! Without interrupting the flow of the story and without confusing, loooong retrospections, we get to see some events from that past. Those things were already mentioned, so we understand with importance they carry, but we have a chance to see them told is a natural narration, and not as thoughts of a character in the middle of some conversation. That also makes the event more "believable," because memory can fail and slightly (or not-so-slightly) deform the facts and how we remember them, but in this case we see everything from the neutral point of view of the narrator.
Author's Response: Thanks GR: All of the Heritage books will be told in this style: current time interspersed with flashback interludes. I feel it's extremely important for the reader to understand where and how these children were influenced and molded by those around them as they grew. To be honest - it's the real meat of the story.