Date: 14 Apr 2013 23:22 Title: Chapter 1
Ok, I don't normally key into AUs that are so alternate - Kirk and Mitchell as lifeguards - but hey the challenge has brought me here and so has Cuppy's recommendation. From the first chapter however I can say despite the fact the life Kirk is now leading in this AU is quite pedestrian by his standards, you somehow managed to ground things so that I buy into it.
Particularly smart is having the focus here on Mitchell and his inclusion makes things familiar and safe allowing for the buying into this AU and makes for an interesting exploration of what of for this character. Also one has to appreciate the humour that follows with this.
Author's Response: The idea came in a roundabout way that I don't recall. Deep into bashing the Beach Boys' "That's Why God Made the Radio" album I suspect. I don't think San Francisco has lifeguards as how I thought them. Not even in 2257.
Date: 17 Mar 2013 02:39 Title: Chapter 1
Nice start. And I like that the focus is more on Mitchell than Kirk. He was a character with potential, and as you seem to have a soft spot for the underdeveloped characters, I'm sure he'll come through bigger than life at the end of your virtual pen. :D
Date: 15 Mar 2013 07:02 Title: Chapter 1
Just when you thought it was safe to go in the water...
It was a pretty well done story, the setting was great. Never could picture Kirk as the surfer/life guard type, but you did a pretty good job sticking him in that role. Would have liked to see a line about needing a bigger boat (unless I went blind somewhere in there and missed it), but that would have just been bonus. Very nice job, bud!
Author's Response: thank ye. A younger Kirk might've done well as a surfer type. The Shatner career that wasn't. I think I was consciously avoiding doing Jaws too much, hence no 'boat' line :)
Date: 04 Mar 2013 19:46 Title: Chapter 1
Love the Jaw reference (one of my favorite movies of all time). I like how you mention common items (Jaws--Pizza) things like that. It makes the story all that more real so that the reader can identify with it...great job!