Date: 29 Sep 2013 19:26 Title: Friday Visit
Only you can write about something as mundane as Lili visiting Yipran at home and still make it full of fun and an interesting read. Glad to see the Reversal business is doing well for Lili and Doug.
Chelben is such a joyful youth in this story, and I can picture his fascination with the kept water animals during his visit.
I like that typical Lili, that she can talk for the Coalition and soon uses up her one-hour visit time. Still I find Yipran giving Lili the cuff a very moving and touch little gesture in recognition of the past aid given.
Lili & Doug reaction to the prophecy of a third child was wonderfully human.
Author's Response:
I like writing little children and so Chelben is going to go running around, showing off his artwork, etc. And yeah, Lili kinda yakked through the whole visit. :)
Date: 21 Aug 2013 20:12 Title: Friday Visit
Fascinating little tale. I haven't gotten to know the Calafans yet, but I like what I see here. Lili's kind of adorable when she babbles, and that's one heck of a gift to give. Naturally, I know by now that she does have a third, but here on the first, there's plenty of breathless anticipation and wonder.
Author's Response:
It's got to be overwhelming. And their lives there are just so new, they are confused and suddenly they're being told, hey, there will be two more, watch out. Oh, and by the way, here's something priceless.