[Report This]Date: 15 Jun 2021 14:42 Title: The First Day
It looks like this story has been around for awhile - but not recently updated.
Interesting start - is this the start - or is this an episode in a longer epic?
Thanks! rbs
Author's Response:
These are short stories detailing the long history of one of my series protagonists. To see who he's become by the 24th century, you might want to try Embers of the Fire, my initial USS Gibraltar story.
Date: 25 May 2013 07:56 Title: The First Day
Poet! Pava! Damn, the instructor left no room for any sort of defense Pava could offer. He baited him, owned him, and then told him he might have a shot at becoming the badass we all know he will. You painted this scene very well, the atmosphere leaping off the page, and the back and forth between the troops and the instructor was very believable.
I'll have to reread this and leave all the reviews I neglected to leave before. Forgive me!
But don't kill me yet. Wait till I'm done with the story :)
Author's Response:
No worries, TF, better late than never! :D Thanks for the review!
Date: 25 May 2013 07:54 Title: The First Day
God, I hate the Borg. Poor Pava. This sergeant major knows exactly what buttons to push. Which, of course, is his job, but it doesn't make me wince any less for this poor man who lost his whole world.
Author's Response:
Yeah, it's one of the first steps to the hardening of Pava's heart, which as we know will continue to haunt him for centuries to come.
Thanks for the review!
Date: 13 Apr 2013 00:27 Title: The First Day
Response to the Miranda Fave/Lil black dog read and review challenge
Hi Gibraltar. I promised to read some of your work a few years ago, but never got around to it. Thanks to MF for pointing me in the direction of this piece. Don't know anything about El-Aurians or specific details for the series outside of TOS, but I'm already intrigued by this - it starts off with a young man with something to prove; hints at his background are given, and I already want to know more. Something tells me I'm gonna like this Lar'ragos fellow.
Author's Response:
I certainly hope you'll check out some of his other adventures.
Thanks for the feedback, it's greatly appreciated.
Date: 09 Dec 2009 07:01 Title: The First Day
Hmmmmmmmm! Read this on Gib's recommendation for a SpecOps story, and as I'm so far only part way through EMBERS, Pava's character switch is a WHOA moment for me.
What's happened to make him so angry I wonder? He's obviously a skilled and tenacious combat officer even going by the pieces I've already read of him, but there's a darkness there I really want to find out more about.
As an El-Aurian, it's nice to see that he's not a carbon copy of Guinan's mystical persona (though even she had her moments I guess!) and so I read on while my own characters start to gather dust!
You're doing this on purpose aren't you?
Author's Response:
You've figured out my evil plan! ;-) Much more of his background is revealed futher along in Embers of the Fire and in Geometries of Chance. Let's just say a person can accumulate a lot of personal baggage in 400 years.
Date: 17 Oct 2009 20:12 Title: The First Day
Poet. Damn, the sergeant major really knew how to pick his words. Damning Pava and his people as cowards and almost complicit in their own demise because of their lifestyle and philosophies.
With Guinan as our canon guide to the El Aurian people one might expect an author to create a character equally sage and passive. But we did manage to see fire and steel in Guinan too [I think in particular in confronting Q] and from this you weaved Pava. So whilst it is not hard to imagine someone from Guinan's race becoming angry and embittered, we saw it with Soran in Generations after all, the nth degree to which Pava by all accounts has taken his anger to is chilling.
What makes him compelling as a character is his inner conflict and turmoil over the past deeds and the path of death, carnage and bloodshed he carved. So it is quite a thrilling prospect to read the tale of this path, this history that haunts him as much as in the opening here the death of his family and fall of his world haunts him and sends him to seek a measure of payback, an exactment of revenge.
What exactly his motivations are for enrolling in the Hekosian Royal Army are remain unsaid. We draw our won conclusions. And I suppose with Pava there are certain dark parts of his soul menaing we might not be fully let into his thought process as to what he hoped to achieve by signing up. I guess the chance to hurt others is part of it. To hone his fighting skills - and in part sadly, we know he will learn and hone his skills all too well.
This is an intriguing start. You didn't go more an emotive opener that pushed the cause of Pava seeking this dark path. Instead, Pava is being pushed and almost bullied and certainly provoked by the sergeant major. Riling his temper is something we know we don't want to do. It promises to be an interesting and probably a dark and morally ambigious tale - all so very Pava - everyone's favourite blunt [and not so blunt] instrument.
Author's Response:
Actually, Pava does explain his motivations to Ramirez in Embers of the Fire in the scene after the away team's escape from the Glanisuur refugee camp. That's one of the reasons I decided not to re-hash his decision making process in The First Day. And yes, once he arrives at Hekosian basic training, the damage to his psyche has been done and he's already made the choice to sign up and let the winds of fortune send him where they may.
Thank you for a very thougthful review and introspective feedback on this story. I'm glad to know it struck a chord with you. : )
[Report This]Date: 06 Aug 2009 23:45 Title: The First Day
War is hell, and it makes for hellish bedfellows. Excellent long-term study of the evolution of a warrior to something beyond prey or predator. I found myself liking this character, sometimes despite myself.
Author's Response:
Thanks! Pava's a work-in-progress, changing as he strives to make up for the sins of his past without creating too many sins of the present. He's a man at odds with himself, hating what he's become even as he revels in his accomplishments as a soldier.
I appreciate the feedback.
Date: 02 Aug 2009 01:41 Title: The First Day
Thank you for giving us a look in Pava's past. We finally get to see how many skeletons are in his closet and the demons he carries within...Hopefully he can one day rid himself of them and find peace.
Author's Response:
One would hope, but we'll see. Old habits die hard. Thanks for the comments!
[Report This]Date: 14 Apr 2009 20:19 Title: The First Day
I love these kind of complex, tormented characters who've done evil, but *aren't* evil -- people who want to do the right thing, but sometimes there's no right thing to do, and sometimes they're seduced by circumstances into doing the wrong thing.
I already mentioned in my review of "Geometries" that I really liked Lar'ragos. Reading more of his story just cemented that. I'm hoping to find him in the rest of your Gibraltar stuff as well... it'll just take some time to get to. :-)
Author's Response:
Thanks! Pava's a great deal of fun to write. He's complex and volatile and occasionally it's even difficult for me to get a handle on what he's thinking. ;-)
Date: 02 Apr 2009 08:48 Title: The First Day
Pava
And in this forge was made steel,
And from this steel came the blade,
And this blade did smote,
These enemies before him.
Here you can see the hint of his future philosophy.
Author's Response:
Wow, nice poem. Is that yours or are you quoting someone else's work? Either way, it's a very good insight into Pava's psyche.