Her eyes fluttered open as a bright white light shone into them.
Tazla Star’s first thought was that she had been wrong all along. Perhaps an afterlife did exist. Her vision was foggy but when it cleared she recognized the smiling visage of a familiar face. Doctor Alan Newheiser. If this was an afterlife, she thought, she had gone straight to hell. She wouldn’t complain. She knew she deserved little better.
“Sleeping beauty awakes.” His voice sounded to her as if it was a few light-years away. “Well I guess the beauty part is no longer appropriate. I wouldn’t worry too much about it now. We’ll fix you back up alright. You’ll be like new, maybe even better.”
She could hardly move her head but it was enough to realize that she was in sickbay. More precisely, Sacajawea’s sickbay.
Her throat felt dry and her body numb. So numb in fact she couldn’t feel any of her extremities, couldn’t even lift a finger. She was completely helpless and that feeling scared her more than anything else.
“No doubt you’re wondering what has happened.” Newheiser refused to part with his irritating smile. “Things haven’t gone very smoothly since you decided to leave us, I’m afraid and judging from your presence here I’d say the outcome of your mission was equally complicated.”
Star didn’t appreciate the open implications and strained herself to make sure they were alone in sickbay. To her relief she found that they were.
“Schwarzkopf, in his boisterous manner, had to go running after you and lead his big splendid vessel right into the middle of a syndicate trap designed to turn any ship into space dust. I don’t know what you’ve done to Mahoney but it certainly deflated him enough to decide to sit out the rescue attempt headed by the Bluefin. Something to be said about those Border Dogs, they bailed Schwarzkopf out after taking some casualties themselves. The grapevine has it that the two captains are no longer on speaking terms. Not that they were fond of each other to begin with.”
Star tried to pay attention to what the doctor was saying but it was difficult for her to concentrate. Her mind and now suddenly her conscience were punishing her for what she had done, the people who had been killed, all in one way or another resulting from the decisions she had made.
“We joined the party late and just in time, it turns out to pick up the remaining debris of your freighter. Imagine Mahoney’s surprise when he found you inside, barely alive. You were very lucky. The extremely low temperature kept you from bleeding to death but a few minutes longer and you wouldn’t have made it.” He almost chuckled as if it was all one big joke. He bent over Star and moved closer. “Mahoney is on his way here now. I suggest you get your story straight before you talk to him.”
Star’s green eyes looked like poison as she shot venom at the man. She wanted to speak but somehow the words never left her mouth.
“Oh, that’s right.” Newheiser made a gesture like he had remembered something important. “You can’t talk right now. A bit of an after effect of the treatment, I'm afraid. But don't worry, it’ll all come back to you eventually.”
The doors to sickbay swished open and Evan Mahoney strode in with exaggerated confidence. He had not yet fully recovered from his involuntary drug overdose earlier. His eyes were still bloodshot and his face much paler than usual. His walk somewhat unsteady. Four heavily armed security specialists were following him to make sure to communicate his resolve.
Newheiser stood up straight and approached them quickly with an annoyed frown on his face. “Commander, what is the meaning of this? I object to you intruding into my sickbay in this manner. In fact, judging by the looks of it, I'd say you might need a bed down here yourself.”
On any other occasion Star might have been amused by the doctor’s obvious dramatics. He would have made a decent actor.
“Never mind me, Doctor. I’m here to place Captain Star under arrest for disobeying direct orders.” He afforded the man nothing more than a passing glance.
“She is in no condition to be hauled away to the brig. Her injuries were severe and she will require ample time for recuperation. It's a miracle she's even still alive.”
Mahoney ignored the doctor and stepped up next to Star.
With no words available to her she gave Mahoney the same treatment she had given Newheiser.
Mahoney was not impressed. He looked her over carefully. The right side of her face was badly burned and so was much of her hair. Her clothing was dirty and singed all over and her lower right arm was gone, replaced by a metallic cast.
He touched her gently on her good cheek. She flinched but couldn’t move away. “A shame about that pretty face of yours,” he said. “You know, we could have had something, you and me. But you were too stubborn to see that, weren’t you? And now what did it get you?” He drank in her piercing eyes for a moment. “You’ll be court-martialed of course for violating orders and a dozen other offenses and after spending the best remaining years of your life in a maximum security stockade you’ll be stripped of your rank and honor and you’ll be nothing to anyone ever again. In the meantime I will assume command of Sacajawea,” he said and smirked. “Funny thing about fate, don’t you think? In the end everybody gets exactly what they deserve.” He leaned in a little closer so only she could hear him. “And you'll pay for what you did to me, Taz. You'll pay dearly. Maybe I come look you up in thirty of forty years time when you get out of prison. An old broken woman good for nobody. We'll settle our final score then, what do you say?” He smirked. “Truthfully I don't even think you're going to last that long.”
“Alright, Commander, that’s enough. I have to insist that you and your men leave my patient to rest now.” Newheiser stepped up next to him, clealry not willing to take no for an answer this time.
Mahoney nodded. “Certainly Doctor, she’ll need all her strength for what’s to come.” He threw her a last pitiful look without being able to mask his contempt. “Good luck, Taz. I wish I could say it has been a pleasure.” He walked away, instructing the security guards to take position outside sickbay.
Once they were alone again Newheiser turned to his patient. She looked furious, not because of what had happened to her but for the lack of a chance to spit into Mahoney’s face.
“You did alright.”
She threw him a puzzled look.
“Oh, sure it doesn’t look particularly good for you right now but at the end of the day you did what you had to. And you completed your mission. You didn't extract the package but you ensured nobody else would be able to either. Our friend won’t forget this. It may not have gone the way we planned but some good came out of this. Schwarzkopf for one will be made to suffer for his arrogance and truth be told he’s always been a thorn in our side.”
Disgusted with what Newheiser was saying she turned her head away.
“Of course you won’t get away cleanly either. A court martial will be unavoidable and you probably get a year or two inside, a demotion in rank perhaps. But he’ll be there to take care of you, I promise you that. He does not ever forget his people. Especially not those who demonstrate their loyalty the way you have done. Rest assured that your future looks very promising.”
With that Newheiser turned and left as well.
Star hadn’t listened. She no longer cared about what would happen to her, she didn’t care if they stripped her of her rank, threw her into a dungeon for the rest of her life or if she never set foot onto a starship ever again. She had betrayed herself and those who had come before her. She had betrayed those who had once trusted her and it had cost them their life. She had betrayed her uniform and her solemn pledge and in the end she had nothing left.
As far as Tazla Star was concerned she no longer had a future only a past filled with shame and disgrace.